Wednesday, April 30, 2014

Am I a Psychopath?

Sadie frequently asks herself this question ...

And so should YOU!

According to experts in the field of neuroscience, 1-4% of the population can be qualified as psychopaths. Chances are, you know a few--and, since you're visiting this blog, there's a good chance you are one!

What, exactly, is a psychopath? 

The term came into use in the early 1800s and was applied to mental patients who appeared outwardly normal, but lacked empathy and seemed to posses no sense of right and wrong. 

In the 1930s, the term was changed to sociopath to reflect the negative impact these people can have on society. These days, the term sociopath has lost favor--though is sometimes applied to a psychopath scoring lower on the continuum. 


Here are 5 signs that indicate you're a psychopath:

1. You don't get what the big deal is about feelings. Emotions are for wimps, and you don't have them.

2. Blood and guts do not repulse you--in fact, you find them fascinating.

3. If it weren't for other people, you would have no problems.

4. The only difference between truth or lies is a matter of opinion.

5. No question about it: most people are imbeciles.

Still unsure if you're a psychopath? 

Friday, April 25, 2014

Free on Amazon, April 25-29: Sadie the Sadist

Click to unleash Sadie!

She wants to be inside your Kindle, iPad, computer ... inside your brain. 

Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Horror Novel Reviews awards 5 Stars to Sadie the Sadist

Sadie just wet her pants, cause ...
Horror Novel Reviews awarded her 5 stars!

Reviewer, Myra Gabor, says: "If you have an impish sense of humor a la Alfred Hitchcock, then this book is for you."

Alfred Hitchcock


If there's one person Sadie would loooove to invite over for dinner, it's Alfred. 

Check out Horror Novel Reviews for horror news, writing, merchandise, and the rest of the review of Sadie.

Monday, April 21, 2014

No Longer a Virgin-5 Star Review for Sadie from Dark Distractions

Casey Douglass of Dark Distractions-mental seepage from stygian (had to look that up ... it means related to the river Styx, a topic I go on about in other books written in another life) realms popped Sadie's cherry with a 5-star review!

Here's a quote from the review:

Sadie the Sadist is a brutal tale that is an easy and sometimes queasy read. If you like your fiction extreme, adult and with a dark humour, you will like this. There are elements that are American Psychoesque but Sadie takes them to greater, bloodier extremes. You will also learn something about corn.

Read the rest of the review

The River Styx

Check out Casey's Writing

Monday, April 14, 2014

Sadie the Sadist Escaped from My Computer ...

And found her way to Amazon! 

Authorities believe she tunneled through the power cord while I was sleeping.


She's dangerous, insane, and may offer to make you dinner. By that I mean: make YOU dinner. 

For more information, download the book on Amazon

Reward: Insanity


Saturday, April 12, 2014

Online Dating-Pros and Cons from Sadie the Sadist

Should You Try Online Dating?

You don't have to be a loser to date online. These days, everyone is doing it. 

But, before you jump into the Web and reveal your innermost thoughts and desires, Sadie offers you some sage advice and gives you the Pros and Cons regarding some frequently asked questions:

1) Is it easy to get a date?

Pro: Depends what you call a date. Most guys I’ve met online are cheap, cheap, cheap. You’re lucky if they spring for a cuppa Java, let alone a BJ. My advice: forget Match and eHarmony; hit sites like Sugardaddy where guys put out.

Con: Getting a date is easy--just tell them what they want to hear (you're easy) and guys will be lining up. The Internet provides a great resource for targets. Get his real name as soon as possible, use a site like AnyWho to find out where he lives and calculate his net worth. Then look him up on Google Earth.

2) What should I say in my profile?

Pro: Take a tip from men. They lie about everything: income, age, weight, height—especially marital status. Who cares? As long as they have credit cards.

Con: A good photo is everything. Stake out guys you like, see what they go for, then choose your pic accordingly. Don’t worry about other stuff, politics, religion—all that bs. Most guys won’t get past your cleavage.

3) How long should we email or talk on the phone before we meet face-to-face?

Pro: Generally, you want to meet as soon as possible. Who wants to waste time talking? But timing depends on how much you lied on your profile. 

Con: Stall until you’ve milked him for as much information as possible. Once you’ve gained his confidence, set up a date (preferably in another town)—that way you’ll get him out of the way while you break into his house.

Sadie Says: Online dating is like shopping. You need to be selective. Who wants a hot dog when you can have steak? But, even if you meet up with a loser, you'll have fun bursting his bubble. And, online, there's always a fresh cut of meat.

Sunday, April 6, 2014

InQuisition of Jeroen ten Berge by Sadie the Sadist

Armed and Dangerous:

International Criminal

Jeroen ten Berge designed the cover for Sadie the Sadist. 

I wanted the best. Jeroen has designed covers for many well known authors including Blake Crouch and Barry Eisler, so I'm in good (or maybe bad) company.

Jeroen was foolish enough to stop by my blog for an interrogation from Sadie.

Hi Jeroen, how’re you doing? Wait. Don’t answer that, it’s not one of my questions. Zané sent me to this interview, because she knows I like hunky guys.

What’s wrong? Why are you blushing?

Don’t tell me!

Damn. That’s already three questions.

I’ll start over ...  You did the cover for Sadie the Sadist (Zané wanted a brilliant cover, so getting you was a no brainer), and when I visited your website Jeroen ten Berge I see you’ve done a lot of covers for a lot of deranged authors. including Blake Crouch (my neighbor), Barry Eisler (I dated him), Christopher Rice (isn’t his mother a vampire?), and Marcus Sakey (true story: when he flew out of this town, he got caught carrying explosives). A lot of guys.

Who, in your opinion, writes the sickest books? And how can I contact him for a date?

Wait, wait, wait ... here’s the rest of the question: describe how you come up with a cover. (That’s really not a question, so will you give me Barry Eisler’s phone number?)

So if you are Blake's neighbor - which I know isn't true - would you've been his inspiration for Lucy? Because she's one psycho bitch Sadie would seriously love to tap. Maybe you and Blake should co-author a story about Lucy and Sadie. Good Girls Gone Bad. Could be sick. Does this answer your question? Because I would say Blake probably tops the list.  

Yeah, Blake is a sick puppy. I think he stalks me. BTW, I’m not a liar. Speaking of sick animals and liars, how did you get into creating covers? And what did you do before this?

I was kidding you. I know you’re not a liar – you just have a vivid imagination. Or did Blake move back? I designed book covers before Jeff Bezos sold second hand books from a garage.

I didn’t think you were that old. Have you had plastic surgery?

Ha! Actually. Yes.

Other things came along that sidetracked the book cover designing for a while. My stage name was Happy Hippo. Then one day I read Blake's Desert Places and Locked Doors and sent him an email because I thought his books sucked donkey balls. This was in January 2006. Ever since we have been sending each other hate mails. And we've worked together ever since because we both enjoy pain.

I’d like to hear more about the Happy Hippo thingy. Once I saw a hippo being fed loaves of Wonder Bread at Central Park Zoo in New York City. 

Jeroen: Danced for a while to make some extra cash. Think Magic Mike, but with flab. That’s behind me now. As well as the flab!


What’s your favorite food, Jeroen? I like to cook. Want to come over for dinner?

Love to come over for dinner - what's the dress code? 

I think you should wear your g-string. But clothing's not a problem. Power tools cut through cloth.


Stop avoiding my question. What's your favorite food? (I want to fatten you up.)

(This cover was banned on Facebook)

Gawd... anything that is made from fresh produce (I know your meat is fresher than anyone's), and prepared with love and attention. Currently I love lamb tagine, a Morroccon dish - a bit like stew. Lots of lamb where I live. Happy in the field, happy on the plate, happy in the hippo. (The views expressed in this interview with Jeroen ten Berge do not necessarily reflect the views of Jeroen ten Berge).

I think hippos are vegetarians. I read online that they eat 88 pounds of grass each night. They must be really out of it.

If you could have any superpower, what would it be and why?

Time travel. You fill in the rest.

You’re kind of lazy, aren’t you? My guess is, you’d like to time travel, so you could get out of work.

I can be lazy, but I just wanted to check whether man did indeed walk with dinosaurs.

I don't think so, Jeroen. But if you time travel, I guess you could be the first. 

Have you ever used a larger canvas, and do you want to? What would you paint on the Empire State building?

I have painted on canvasses – how did you know? My largest paintings are 4 by 5 feet. Made two of those. More smaller ones. Will probably have to grow a ginger beard and cut off both ears before I sell any of them. Ha... what a dirty mind you have - we share that trait. Bet you'd think I would say 'penis!' 

You’re really quite the mind-reader, Jeroen. 

Well, maybe I would paint one, on one side – Simpson’s style. On the opposite side a corn cob to accommodate your fantasies and to balance the yellow penis. On the sides in between a hand gun because I love the aesthetics (not how they are used oftentimes) on one side, and a young deer on the other.

You're very creative. I like this gun arrangement that looks like a snowflake. Inspired by Blake Crouch's story, Abandon. 

And you seem to be obsessed with penises and corn. No wonder we get along.

HEY! Where you going? Come back.